Be Still....He's Got You

      I have been on quite the hiatus when it comes to blogging. I used to blog daily, sharing my journey and my thoughts but recently I have been real quiet. Not just on the internet, but in my life too. Maybe a little too quiet. There is a time monster in all of our lives when we learn that it may be wiser to remain silent, prayerful, and still then it is talk and move forward. This is a hard lesson monster, especially for one such as me who is not used to having to guard my mouth. I have always been quick to talk and slow to think it through first. I have always shared my thoughts and opinions freely, I have been quick to display anger and impatience, but in my journey I have learned to be still. I am not going to say it is easy, monster, it is not. It will be the hardest thing you master, the hardest thing you will ever do. To be still, to allow the Lord to move, to make a way, to deal with your enemies, to fight your battles while you are still, will be the hardest but the most rewarding experience of your walk.

    What do I mean by being still. I am not talking about inaction, or sitting back waiting on things I am talking about moving forward on your path, doing the work you have been called to do. You are still praying, you are still in your Word, you are still doing you. So how is that being Still? When I say be still it means not to pay attention to the distractions that are going to arise. As you walk with the Lord you will be blessed. You will get the job you have been praying for, get that breakthrough in your life you have been working towards, you will be enjoying all the blessings that come with it and while your enjoying it, the enemy is throwing things in your path to make you stumble. The enemy will throw people at you, situations, etc. to make you falter, to make you question and to ultimately make you leave your path. Don't give in monster, no matter what comes at you, be still, knowing that God has already worked it out. 

Here is what it looks like. You have finally gotten the job you have been praying for. You are happy, you are making lots of money, you are finally able to be the blessing you always wanted to be. Everything is great until it is not. Your car breaks down, your babysitter quits, and your co-worker is throwing so much shade at you she could be an oak tree. I mean seriously, what is wrong with her that she is constantly bad mouthing you, undermining you and basically making your dream job a nightmare. What do you do? Do you throw a fit, tell her where she needs to go and how to get there? Or do you be still. 

Scenario 2. You are finally in the relationship you have been praying about. You have met the man you are going to marry. You pray together, you go to church together, you are actively building a life together.  You are happy and you expect the others around you to be happy as well.... yeah not so much. Your getting advice from this one and that one, everyone has an opinion, some think your moving too fast, some don't like him, some just liked you better single who knows but everywhere you turn you find a new opinion. What do you do? 
Scenario 3. You are finally getting your degree, you have made it into the program, everything is great until it is not. You don't like your study group, your classes are not available, the books are too much, your job is tripping about all the time you have been requesting off. You are distracted by everything going on around you what do you do? 

Be still monster. I don't know what your dealing with in your life, but I know at times it can be stressful, You have so many things pulling at you, people talking into your life, everyday stresses and set backs and you just want to fire back. Be still. Psalm 46:10 "Be Still and Know that I am God."  simply means that you don't have to do anything. You don't have to defend yourself from attack. Exodus 14:14 The LORD shall fight for you, and you shall hold your peace. Hold on to your peace monster. You don't have to tell that chick where to go, you don't have to fight and argue with your family, you don't have to do anything. You can be still knowing that the battle is the Lord's and that no weapon formed against you will prosper. You can relax and bathe in the light that tells us that All things work together for the good of them who love the Lord. This monster is being still. Keep doing what your doing. all these obstacles and trials tell you is that you are heading in the right way. So next time someone throws some dirt your way, don't worry, God has got your back. 

I wish you stillness monster. 

Malarkey, Balderdash, Hogwash and other Foolishness

   

 Happy Tuesday Monsters, how is the taming of the tongue going? Harder then you thought huh? I have been practicing being silent, I have been absent on twitter and face book, I have not responded to the off the wall posts that we call social media, I have smiled and nodded rather then engage in conversations at work. I have thought before I spoke and become a woman of few words. For now. I don't know about you but I am bursting to tell other people to shut up!  I mean really when your quiet, you start to really take notice of the chatter going on around you. All that chatter, all the tweets, all the updates, even the face to face convos are full of mess. I said it. Foolishness! Mess, and yes to quote Biden, "malarkey." As people we say a whole lot of nothing. Think of all that air pollution. I look back on some of my own chatter, tweets and status updates and wish I could have back all the millions of seconds I wasted telling people how much i love sunshine, go bulls, and "liking" of random stuff. If I had all those seconds back I could be making history instead of posting about it on my face book page.

       The most important thing I learned during my forced silence is not to argue with fools.

Unfortunately I seem to know quite a lot of fools. I am sure you do too, in fact you may be a fool right now. The good news is you do not have to stay one. When I say foolish  I don't mean stupid or ignorant (Though my face book friend list seems to have an abundance of them also) I mean people who don't think before they speak. People who make great business decisions but horrible personal ones. People who make excellent personal ones and horrible business ones. People who for the most part are smart, kind, loving, until they sit in front of a keyboard, then all their foolishness shows. People who just have wrong thinking about a whole host of things. That is the foolishness I am speaking on.

    Don't get me wrong monster we are all at times  foolish.We have all made foolish choices, made foolish statements, and just in general acted a fool at one time or another. However there should come a time when we let all that foolishness go. There should come a time when our appetite for it diminishes and disappears, a time that as we walk in the Light, we become wiser. We should at some point stop looking to our education, our friends, our experiences etc and look to the Lord and ask for wisdom. The wisdom to do right, act right, think right, choose better friends, choose better dates, choose better jobs and lifestyles. Eventually in our walk with God we should be able to move past the foolishness.

    Let me share some random conversations and posts I have come across in my pondering on fools and foolishness.  Foolishness is what keeps you in a bad relationship yet you keep asking for advice. It is what makes you make snide comments about people, it makes you stay in a dead end job or spend your paycheck before you get it. Foolishness is buying 200 dollar gym shoes and your rent is due. Foolishness is doing the same ignorant thing over and over again and wanting different results. Foolishness is posting half naked pictures of yourself on the Internet and then beating your daughter for staying out all night with her boyfriend. Foolishness is arguing with someone who makes racist, sexist or bigoted comments on an anonymous forum. Foolishness is knowing what is right and not doing it. You starting to get the picture?

The world is full of foolishness, lucky for us we have the solution. The Word. The bible tells us that if anyone lacks wisdom, ask the Lord,(James 1:5) it tells us to put away childish behavior, ( 1 Corinthians 13:11) to cease from foolish talk(Ephesians 5:4) and to not hang around fools.(1 Corinthians 15:33) It is all there a whole manual on how to live, to be wise, to make wise choices. The only catch is you have to actually read it. The world is infected with foolishness and malarkey, you only have to turn on the television or the computer for that matter and you will be bombarded with reality shows full of people acting a fool, talk shows, news forums and programs that celebrate ignorance and vulgarity. You can be infected and spread it or you can be the cure. Foolishness has to stop with you. You choose how you speak, to whom you speak, and the content of your speech. So monster are you a fool. I would hope not, but just in case you may have a mild case of it, a good dose of the Word will clear that all up.

Be wise monster, be wise.

The Taming of the Tongue, Shut up already

   Happy February monsters. How is the love walk going? In case you haven't noticed I have not been blogging as much as I was. A part of that is I have been crazy busy juggling being a mom, planning a wedding, working and all the other things that make up a life. More importantly I have been working on me, specifically my mouth.  With day to day issues and frustrations it is easy to say things you don't mean, to talk about people and situations that annoy you, to gossip, to rant, and to make comments you may later regret. Yup with all the stuff going on in my life its easy to lose ground on the things I thought I had dealt with, my mouth being one of them. Lucky for you monster my slip ups make great topics for this blog.

    Throughout this blog and my journey I have discussed the importance of changing the way you think, guarding your heart, and speaking good things into your life. I seem to have overlooked the whole watching what you say thing, I mean it was easy to call out others on what they say, but myself not so much. In fact recently I have found myself so annoyed with the words coming out of the mouth of someone I loved, that I had to pause and see that God was placing a mirror in front of me. Yup, it was time to work on my mouth, after all what is the point of having pretty lips if every word that comes out of them is ugly? Ponder that monster, ponder that.

   

 So what should you not be saying, let's go to my favorite place, Proverbs. Proverbs is chuck full of wisdom, and a whole bunch of it is dedicated to watching your mouth. It talks about lying, bad mouthing, slander, gossip, foolish talking, deceitfulness, speaking out in anger, rash words, and even about when to shut up. The more I read it the more I realize that I could have saved myself a ton of drama just by being quiet. "Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble" Proverbs 21:23. We all know that lying is wrong, gossip is not so good and slander, slander you could be prosecuted for, or is it libel, either way you want to stay away from it."Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler." Proverbs 20:19 "A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends" Proverbs 16:28 Then there is the grey area. Sarcasm, dry wit, perverse speaking, etc. So basically the majority of my smart comments and mean but funny statements should never have been uttered. Harsh, but true.

        So what are we supposed to do monster, it's not like you can walk around with a muzzle on or a gag, so not fashionable. It is easy, it is time to shut up. Yup I said it, shut up. Next time you want to talk, make a comment, discuss someone, joke about something, shut up. Harsh huh? Before you speak think. Is what you are about to say a sword or not. Are you verbally murdering someone? Are you making a situation/conversation better or worse? Is it something you wouldn't mind saying to Jesus? The Bible says that we are to think about the good, the just, the lovely, if you are thinking these things then there is no room for the ugliness that can escape your lips. (Philippians 4:8) There are times when you think that your not really gossiping or your just telling your friend what you heard, the Bible also covers this. It says that love covers all things and a trustworthy friend will shield their friend from the hurt.

grace  

/grās/

Noun Simple elegance or refinement of movement.

Verb Do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one's presence.

Synonyms noun.   favour - favor - charm - elegance - mercy - gracefulness verb.   adorn - decorate - ornament - embellish - deck - bedeck

As for the snide comments and the off color jokes we are all guilty of enjoying, try this one on for size.  "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." Ephesians 4:29.  Grace, now there is word you don't hear often. In fact it has all but disappeared from our vocabulary, it is more then just a popular name for a little girl.  We as ladies should be gracious and kind. Unfortunately we seem to be a generation of mean girls we mistake cattiness for charm and mean spirited talking for wit. Do the words you use with others do honor or credit, is it a pleasure to be in your company, are you elegant, refined? According to the words you use and the content of your conversation, I would say no.  

So you see monster, you have great power in your tongue. It can be a sword, destroying and cutting at every turn or it can be a healer, a balm to the bruised, an instrument of peace, and a source of wisdom. You decide on what you want it to be. I still struggle with this, as I am sure you do. The good news is that you can master your mouth, it is as simple as shutting it. While it is shut get to reading, start with proverbs then do a search of all the verses that deal with your tounge. I did, I still do, It is a walk that we are on monster. This is just one step in it. So how do you  get started taming your tounge? Easy, when in doubt, shut up. 

Happy talking monster, happy talking 

Growing Pains

     Hey monsters, It has been awhile since I dropped some wisdom on you. But like all truth seekers know you have to go through some tests to get a testimony, and through some mess to get a message, so now that I have passed some tests, waded through some mess, let's get to the message.

           Let's talk about growing pains. I have been experiencing them lately, and I am sure you have to. After all you have been working on you. Cleaning out your past locker, healing what needs to be healed, basking in the blessings, congratulations monster you are growing. Growing is a great thing. It is an awesome thing. I know that I felt about 2 feet tall when I was in my most recent between time. I wasn't working, I lived back home with my mom, and I was so far from my dreams they didn't even feel like mine anymore. The between time is a scary time, it is a time when God strips away all the crutches we hang on too. He strips away all the things that we think define us, make us, give us a place in the world we have built for ourselves. This is not for your harm monster, but for your best. God needs to strip away all the outer things, all the external things, all the superficial things to teach us that without them we are still His.
Psalm 139:13-16 
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."




 We are created in His Image. We learn that we are not defined by who we know, who we date, how much we make, where we work, live, etc. We learn that we are sufficient and complete and that all that stuff, all those people don't get to define us. We are enough. God has seen to that. He has planned us, and our lives, even though we may drift from where we need to be He still has a purpose and a plan for us.
Ephesians 2:10  "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Thus we begin to grow.

    The downside to growing is of course things start to not fit. Things get tight, they don't look right, sound right,  act right, there is not enough room, its not good enough. The "it" in any of these sentences can be replaced with anything, your relationship, your friendship, your home life, your job, your whatever. It does not fit anymore. You are growing. Its time to move on, to find where you fit, to find with who you fit, don't worry you won't have to actually look for any of this God has a great way of bringing the right fits into your life. Not to beat a dead horse but like I said before He has a plan for you. So what do you do when you have all this growth going on in your life? You're moving forward, you're learning, you're becoming but everything around you is stagnant, its not growing, its not changing, its getting tight, it doesn't feel right, etc.
Two words, move forward. Monster, it's time to move forward. It's time to let go

        Here is what it looks like. You are hanging with all your old friends, and nothing they say interests you, the life they are living, that they used to live with you feels awkward. You don't party like you used to, you don't gossip, you don't fight, you don't do a lot of things you used to so they feel like you have changed, like you think your better so in order to fit in you pretend to go along. You become a master of pretending to be who you used to be just so they feel comfortable. Until now. Now they irritate you, you would rather be anywhere else but there. You have no desire to pretend any longer, you move on.
How about this one monster, you have an ok job, one where they don't expect too much of you, and you don't expect that much of yourself. It is a good job but you know you can do better, you know that you have the skills, the talent and the drive to do so much more. What do you do? Move forward.

Its is scary to move forward, you are comfortable, it feels safe, it is a place, person, situation that you know, but it just doesn't fit the new you. God has intended you for greatness. Good enough is not enough. Those pains your feeling, those irritants, insecurities, temper tantrums, they are all part of your growth, monster. You don't need the safety of your situation anymore, it's time to move forward. Trust me, your ready, God has and is preparing you for the next stage in your life. Grab it monster. Move forward. There is a story in the bible about a lame man who could not walk. Jesus healed him. The man had a choice he could stay where he was, fully healed, fully restored, with an entire future before him of he could get up, move forward and walk into his future. "Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” John 5:8 

Monster, pick up your bed, and walk, better yet leave that old bed right where it is and walk away. Move Forward.

What about your friends?

     Hey Monster, how has the fight against hate been going. I have been doing my part, and I will admit that is an uphill battle! It is so much easier to see and comment on the negative then it is to see and appreciate the positive.  We are going to switch it up a bit and talk about the people you have been keeping company with. The people that speak into your life, whether for your good or your ill. Take a good look at the people in your life, are they celebrating your life or are they some of your biggest haters?

    You may have noticed that along your journey you may have lost a few traveling companions. People you used to hear from on a regular basis drop out of sight. You find that the people that were drawn to you when you were at your lowest, or worst begin to disappear. You may even encounter that people you have know nearly your whole life, or at least for a large chunk of it, start to look at you strange. They are noticing the changes you are making in your life, they are seeing what God is doing and they really could care less. They look at your past, and want to keep you there. They laugh at the "new" you and try to discourage any positive growth. They want you to stay the way you were, you know the way they remember you. Here is what it looks like monster.

    You were always the girl with tons of drama, you partied, you drank, you were up for last minute trips anywhere. You had lots of guys, lots of heartbreak, lots of bad breaks. You could sit for hours talking about all your drama, and they could shake their heads and commiserate with you, while secretly enjoying your pain. Why? Because they could tell themselves, "at least I am not her".  The thing about getting over your past and moving forward is that sometimes people need to be left in the past as well. They will never see you as anything other then what you used to be. No matter how much you have changed, what you have learned or how far you have traveled you will always be the "old you" to them. 

Be careful of this monster. You will be tempted to live up to their low expectations. They will encourage you to revel in the bad behaviors of the Before, and they will rejoice in your backsliding. Or maybe you have made some new friends, maybe they remind you of the way you used to be. You think that you could be a good influence on them, after all you have come so far, you know so much. The danger of this is that you are new at this new life thing. They are more likely to draw you into their mess then you are to draw them out. 1 Corinthians 15:33 Be not deceived: evil companions corrupt good morals. 
Proverbs 24 is full of warnings about becoming friends with people who are evil, who speak deceitfully, who plot against others, who lie in wait for trouble, who are foolish. In other words it is like my grandma used to say birds of a feather flock together. Take a good hard look at the people in your life, is it time to let some of them go? You never stop loving them, praying for them , treating them with respect, but you should be careful about the time you spend with them, what secrets of the heart you entrust to them, and what influence you allow them to have in your life. 

Words are powerful and you have been working hard at controlling the words you use, the thoughts you harbor in your heart and what you speak into your life. Doesn't it make sense to limit the words and thoughts that others speak into your life, especially when they are not for your highest good? 
You have been doing such a good job cleaning out your life, getting rid of the junk, and filling your heart with the gifts of the spirit, now it is time to clean up your friendship roster. I wish you well in this monster and I pray that once they are gone God will send you the right people to share your life with.  In fact I know he will. He has already started filling my life with people who genuinely care for me, who celebrate with me, who speak truth and love into my life.  God is a God of relationship. He wants to have a relationship with you, and He wants you to have great relationships with others. 
Today, monster, I pray that for you. 

Hating.... A Global Epidemic

    Hey there monsters. I hope you have been celebrating. Celebrating yourself, and celebrating with others. I know it may seem difficult at first, but the more you share love and joy with others, the more you will experience love and joy in your own life. It is important, love. It is probably the greatest power in the universe, in fact the Word says that it is. (1Corinthians 13:13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.) 

   The world would have you believe that love is weak. that it is conditional, flaky, transient, untrustworthy, and something that can be earned and revoked. The world is not so good at loving, in fact it seems that the world's favorite pastime is hating. They don't call it hating, that would be too obvious. It is disguised as commentary, humor, blogging, criticizing, joking, laughing, tabloids and entertainment. We wait for people to mess up, to break up, to wear the wrong thing, say the wrong thing, etc. just so we can "discuss" them.  The word "haters" has entered our vocabulary seamlessly and has made itself at home in our daily lives. Go ahead and admit it monster, you have hated on somebody. Maybe you knew them personally, maybe you just watch them on t.v. but somewhere, sometime you have hated! Go ahead and admit it. I know you have, I have too. It doesn't seem so bad when its strangers, or people you really don't like, in fact you can fix it up and say your only talking about their behavior and not them. Fix it up anyway you want. Hating is hating. 

   Just so you know, everything you put out into the world will come back to you! Don't be surprised if someone is hating on you right now.  If you have been hated on you have probably posted some type of rebuttal on Facebook or Twitter, encouraging them to continue hating, to say what they want, it sounds good. It sounds like the right thing to do. We are supposed to accept that people hate us, it has become a badge of honor. It feeds our ego, it lets us know that in a world where people post their every thought and movement, someone, somewhere is envious of you. Shame monster, shame.  Take a look at what you say about people, about situations, about everything. What you say, becomes what you believe, what you believe you think on, what you think on takes up residence in your heart, and what is in your heart comes out of your mouth. "As water reflects a face, so a man's heart reflects the man." proverbs 27:19 It is a  vicious cycle.  It is time to break it. 

   You cannot claim to love God, to love your neighbor and be a "hater". It is time to get control of your mouth. I said it! Put a muzzle on it! That's catchy maybe i will put it to music, make up a dance and win a VMA. Just kidding but I still mean it. It is time to think before you speak. Ephesians 4:29 tells us to not let corrupting talk come out of our mouths, Proverbs is full of wisdom about not speaking foolishly about others, the New Testament is overflowing with verses that teach us how to love and talk and treat each other. It is time to put all that teaching into practice. 

It starts with you, go from being a hater, to a lover. Speak kindness or remain silent. Don't join in the global epidemic of hate, be the cure.