Be Still....He's Got You

      I have been on quite the hiatus when it comes to blogging. I used to blog daily, sharing my journey and my thoughts but recently I have been real quiet. Not just on the internet, but in my life too. Maybe a little too quiet. There is a time monster in all of our lives when we learn that it may be wiser to remain silent, prayerful, and still then it is talk and move forward. This is a hard lesson monster, especially for one such as me who is not used to having to guard my mouth. I have always been quick to talk and slow to think it through first. I have always shared my thoughts and opinions freely, I have been quick to display anger and impatience, but in my journey I have learned to be still. I am not going to say it is easy, monster, it is not. It will be the hardest thing you master, the hardest thing you will ever do. To be still, to allow the Lord to move, to make a way, to deal with your enemies, to fight your battles while you are still, will be the hardest but the most rewarding experience of your walk.

    What do I mean by being still. I am not talking about inaction, or sitting back waiting on things I am talking about moving forward on your path, doing the work you have been called to do. You are still praying, you are still in your Word, you are still doing you. So how is that being Still? When I say be still it means not to pay attention to the distractions that are going to arise. As you walk with the Lord you will be blessed. You will get the job you have been praying for, get that breakthrough in your life you have been working towards, you will be enjoying all the blessings that come with it and while your enjoying it, the enemy is throwing things in your path to make you stumble. The enemy will throw people at you, situations, etc. to make you falter, to make you question and to ultimately make you leave your path. Don't give in monster, no matter what comes at you, be still, knowing that God has already worked it out. 

Here is what it looks like. You have finally gotten the job you have been praying for. You are happy, you are making lots of money, you are finally able to be the blessing you always wanted to be. Everything is great until it is not. Your car breaks down, your babysitter quits, and your co-worker is throwing so much shade at you she could be an oak tree. I mean seriously, what is wrong with her that she is constantly bad mouthing you, undermining you and basically making your dream job a nightmare. What do you do? Do you throw a fit, tell her where she needs to go and how to get there? Or do you be still. 

Scenario 2. You are finally in the relationship you have been praying about. You have met the man you are going to marry. You pray together, you go to church together, you are actively building a life together.  You are happy and you expect the others around you to be happy as well.... yeah not so much. Your getting advice from this one and that one, everyone has an opinion, some think your moving too fast, some don't like him, some just liked you better single who knows but everywhere you turn you find a new opinion. What do you do? 
Scenario 3. You are finally getting your degree, you have made it into the program, everything is great until it is not. You don't like your study group, your classes are not available, the books are too much, your job is tripping about all the time you have been requesting off. You are distracted by everything going on around you what do you do? 

Be still monster. I don't know what your dealing with in your life, but I know at times it can be stressful, You have so many things pulling at you, people talking into your life, everyday stresses and set backs and you just want to fire back. Be still. Psalm 46:10 "Be Still and Know that I am God."  simply means that you don't have to do anything. You don't have to defend yourself from attack. Exodus 14:14 The LORD shall fight for you, and you shall hold your peace. Hold on to your peace monster. You don't have to tell that chick where to go, you don't have to fight and argue with your family, you don't have to do anything. You can be still knowing that the battle is the Lord's and that no weapon formed against you will prosper. You can relax and bathe in the light that tells us that All things work together for the good of them who love the Lord. This monster is being still. Keep doing what your doing. all these obstacles and trials tell you is that you are heading in the right way. So next time someone throws some dirt your way, don't worry, God has got your back. 

I wish you stillness monster. 

Walk into Abundance

Happy New Year monster. I can not believe that it is already 2013. This time last year I was making resolutions, cleaning out my life, praying for breakthroughs and believing God for new adventures and circumstances. 2012 had its fair share of trials, heart aches, blessings, answered prayers and life changing moments. I am looking forward to the adventures of 2013. 




    So have you made your resolutions yet? Are you sticking with them, or have they already fallen to the wayside. Many people vow to lose weight, get their house organized, start something new, get rid of a bad habit, or get their finances in order. What have you vowed to do in 2013? Anything? Let me offer a suggestion. In 2013 get rid of the lack in your life. Vow to walk in abundance in all things. Tell yourself that this will be the year that you lack for nothing, nothing lacking in your relationships, your career, your home and most importantly your finances. Vow that 2012 is the last year you will ever refer to yourself as broke, unable, not financially solvent, or in a recession. After all your a Child of the Most High and He has promised to meet all your needs, to provide for you, to open doors for you, to bless you. So why as His child should you be walking around in debt, or in lack? 

People get really skittish when you put God and money in the same sentence. It is almost as if they are ashamed to ask the Lord to bless them in this way. It is as if they don't believe that He will or that it is wrong.  Get rid of this thinking monster. God knows what you need, He wants you to have what you need. So go ahead, ask Him. Oh one thing, monster, there is a catch. Yup, you knew there would be, nothing is free right? What is the catch? God wants your life. He wants you to obey Him and to live according to His standards. He wants you to Love Him with all you are, and to love your neighbor. Oh and God wants you to bless others, to give so that you can receive, oh and one more thing, He wants you to tithe. Told you there was a catch. 

Tithe, such a small word, yet it is one of the most debated topics of the church.  People will stop going to church because they are asked to tithe, they will argue about how much and how often they should tithe, they will even argue that it is an Old Testament "thing" and something they no longer have to practice. I am not here to debate theology or church doctrine or any of  that. I really don't care what you believe or what your choose to do.  I am just  here to challenge you. I challenge you to try it, I did and I am more blessed in my finances then ever before. So, monster do you want to take the 2013 challenge. 

Here is what it looks like. Let's go to the Word. In the book of Malachi God challenges us to prove Him. It is the only place in the Bible where He tells us it is ok to test Him. 
Will man rob God? Yet you are robbing me. But you say, ‘How have we robbed you?’ In your tithes and contributions. You are cursed with a curse, for you are robbing me, the whole nation of you. Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need. I will rebuke the devourer for you, so that it will not destroy the fruits of your soil, and your vine in the field shall not fail to bear, says the Lord of hosts. Then all nations will call you blessed, for you will be a land of delight, says the Lord of hosts. Malachi 3: 8-12

 What does this mean for you monster? God owns everything in this world and in the Heavens. He is the reason you are able to draw breath every day and go to work. He has blessed you with a job and an income and He asks that to honor him you give him a mere 10% of that. Right off the top, before you pay bills, buy a cheeseburger, pay your rent, pay yourself. You get to keep the other 90%.  You will find that the 90% will begin to stretch further and further. You will find that you have more money to do what you need to do, so much more that you can begin to do what you want to do. 

I stated earlier that everything is already the Lords', “Every tithe of the land, whether of the seed of the land or of the fruit of the trees, is the Lord's; it is holy to the Lord. Leviticus 27:30  Tithing reminds us that it is His. That is is His favor, His Grace, His Will that is allowing you to earn your money in the first place. It humbles you monster. By keeping Him first and knowing that it is from Him, pride cannot creep in. Nor can greed. Money is not the problem, The love of money is. By returning your tithe to the Lord, you are saying Lord I love you more then this money. "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs" 1Timothy 6:10.  It was the love of money that sent the young man away when he was seeking to follow Jesus. (Luke 18) It was not that he was rich and had many things it was that his many things had him. They had become his idols, they had usurped the place in his heart that belonged to God. 



The second part of the 2013 plan is to give. You cannot be a miser monster. Remember I told you in an earlier blog that God blesses you, not for yourself, but for others. You are the means by which God carries out His plans in the world. When you give your time, your skills, your talent and yes your money to help further the church you are doing God's work in the world.  Be smart in this monster. I am not saying to just give your money away. Take a look at your church whether you are a member or thinking about joining it. Look at what they are doing locally and globally with their missions. Listen to the pastor. Is he preaching the Gospel, the word as inspired by the Holy Spirit and not himself/herself. Is it a ministry where your spirit is being fed. If it is not you need to keep looking for the right church, the right ministry. Once you find it you will know. Then you  can begin sowing into that ministry with your time, your talents and yes, your tithes and offerings. The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. 2 Corinthians 9:6 It is important that in all your giving you give with a willing heart and spirit. That you do not begrudge your offering. God loves a cheerful giver. This goes back to Cain and Abel. Abel loved God, He gave the best he had and was pleasing to God. Cain gave grudgingly, he gave the leftovers and he became jealous when he saw how God blessed his brother. So much so that Cain murdered his brother. If you are going to give unwillingly or just to get something in return or to be seen giving by others, it is best to not give at all. 

The Bible offers even more on giving, tithing and how to deal with money. Get to reading monster you can't expect me to tell you everything. I will add this. In order to get out of debt, out of lack and walk in abundance you will have to work. You will have to work physically, you will have to pray and ask God to bless you, you will have to exercise your faith and believe that all your bills will be taken care of and trust that God will do what he says He will. "Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” Luke 6:38

One last piece of wisdom when dealing with your finances this year, "Pay to all what is owed to them: taxes to whom taxes are owed, revenue to whom revenue is owed, respect to whom respect is owed, honor to whom honor is owed." Romans 13:7

Prosper, monster, prosper. 

Growing Pains

     Hey monsters, It has been awhile since I dropped some wisdom on you. But like all truth seekers know you have to go through some tests to get a testimony, and through some mess to get a message, so now that I have passed some tests, waded through some mess, let's get to the message.

           Let's talk about growing pains. I have been experiencing them lately, and I am sure you have to. After all you have been working on you. Cleaning out your past locker, healing what needs to be healed, basking in the blessings, congratulations monster you are growing. Growing is a great thing. It is an awesome thing. I know that I felt about 2 feet tall when I was in my most recent between time. I wasn't working, I lived back home with my mom, and I was so far from my dreams they didn't even feel like mine anymore. The between time is a scary time, it is a time when God strips away all the crutches we hang on too. He strips away all the things that we think define us, make us, give us a place in the world we have built for ourselves. This is not for your harm monster, but for your best. God needs to strip away all the outer things, all the external things, all the superficial things to teach us that without them we are still His.
Psalm 139:13-16 
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."




 We are created in His Image. We learn that we are not defined by who we know, who we date, how much we make, where we work, live, etc. We learn that we are sufficient and complete and that all that stuff, all those people don't get to define us. We are enough. God has seen to that. He has planned us, and our lives, even though we may drift from where we need to be He still has a purpose and a plan for us.
Ephesians 2:10  "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Thus we begin to grow.

    The downside to growing is of course things start to not fit. Things get tight, they don't look right, sound right,  act right, there is not enough room, its not good enough. The "it" in any of these sentences can be replaced with anything, your relationship, your friendship, your home life, your job, your whatever. It does not fit anymore. You are growing. Its time to move on, to find where you fit, to find with who you fit, don't worry you won't have to actually look for any of this God has a great way of bringing the right fits into your life. Not to beat a dead horse but like I said before He has a plan for you. So what do you do when you have all this growth going on in your life? You're moving forward, you're learning, you're becoming but everything around you is stagnant, its not growing, its not changing, its getting tight, it doesn't feel right, etc.
Two words, move forward. Monster, it's time to move forward. It's time to let go

        Here is what it looks like. You are hanging with all your old friends, and nothing they say interests you, the life they are living, that they used to live with you feels awkward. You don't party like you used to, you don't gossip, you don't fight, you don't do a lot of things you used to so they feel like you have changed, like you think your better so in order to fit in you pretend to go along. You become a master of pretending to be who you used to be just so they feel comfortable. Until now. Now they irritate you, you would rather be anywhere else but there. You have no desire to pretend any longer, you move on.
How about this one monster, you have an ok job, one where they don't expect too much of you, and you don't expect that much of yourself. It is a good job but you know you can do better, you know that you have the skills, the talent and the drive to do so much more. What do you do? Move forward.

Its is scary to move forward, you are comfortable, it feels safe, it is a place, person, situation that you know, but it just doesn't fit the new you. God has intended you for greatness. Good enough is not enough. Those pains your feeling, those irritants, insecurities, temper tantrums, they are all part of your growth, monster. You don't need the safety of your situation anymore, it's time to move forward. Trust me, your ready, God has and is preparing you for the next stage in your life. Grab it monster. Move forward. There is a story in the bible about a lame man who could not walk. Jesus healed him. The man had a choice he could stay where he was, fully healed, fully restored, with an entire future before him of he could get up, move forward and walk into his future. "Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” John 5:8 

Monster, pick up your bed, and walk, better yet leave that old bed right where it is and walk away. Move Forward.

Shifting sands, Mud Slide Zones, and other Faulty Foundations

Hello Monsters. How is your faith walk going? I know your getting stronger every day. You have put the past behind you, forgave yourself for past mistakes, put an end to negative thinking, and all your trust in God.
No, not yet, still working on it? No worries, keep walking, it ain't over till it's over.

So what is the point of this blog? I will tell you. While you have been working on you, God has been blessing you, He has been moving you forward, He has opened doors, introduced people into your life, and done a whole host of other things that are too wonderful and numerous to name. You, monster are moving out of your Between time situation and into your After.  (quick note her there will always be a between time in your life, right now you may be dealing with  several Betweens, between jobs, between relationships, between well you get the point) As you enter the after stage you will begin building, building a new life, a new career, a new relationship, a new mindset, I don't know, the point is your building something. If you ever saw a house being built you know the first thing that is dug is the foundation. The foundation is the core. It is what all else is built upon. Without a good foundation, a strong foundation, a well planned and built foundation the house will fall. The same goes for you monster. Whatever your building for yourself will fail without a good foundation.

If you have been paying any attention to this blog, you know I always go on about reading the Bible, getting that Word deep down into you, I also nag you about praying and praising, going to church, and listening to the still small voice of the Holy Spirit.  The Word, Praying and Praising, Church and the Holy Spirit's Guidance are the cornerstones of your foundation. I don't recommend building anything without these things in place. You can try, but chances are that if you do you will end up back in a between time experience, probably worse off then you were before.  Not to beat a dead horse, but its not enough to give lip service to God, you got to put the things He tells you into practice, everyday. Luke 6:47-49 clearly lays out what to expect when you don't. "As for everyone who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice, I will show you what they are like.  They are like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on rock. When a flood came, the torrent struck that house but could not shake it, because it was well built.  But the one who hears my words and does not put them into practice is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. The moment the torrent struck that house, it collapsed and its destruction was complete.”  Build your foundation, monster, that way when your blessings come and you begin building you will have something that lasts. 

   Here is what it looks like monster. You have been working on you and you have been praying for God to send you the right man, a man that you could marry, build a life with. Suddenly you find yourself with a guy, he is great, he seems to be all you prayed for what do you do? Some of us are tempted to throw away all the promises, the hard work, and the foundation that we have built and jump all in. How do you proceed with this relationship? You said you would not have sex until marriage, do you keep that promise, you said that any man in your life would have to be a Christian, share your faith, and be a man seeking God, do you turn a blind eye when He stops going to church? In your walk you have been dealing with being honest, having integrity, putting God first, do you look the other way when you catch him in a lie, when he is less then what he should be, when he would rather not go to church, pray or even know if he really believes in God. In building this relationship what is your foundation? Is it built on rock or is it shifting sand, changing and moving every time the wind blows something new into your life. Are you willing to build a relationship on this foundation?
     You could have been praying for a job, you got the job, but it is stressing you out, your missing church because you have to work, your too tired to pray anymore, your caught up in everything around you and you are too busy to hear from God. Are you willing to build a career on this foundation? This scenario can be placed on any between time transition you may have. We are so quick to pray and ask for things, for change for breakthroughs that sometimes we latch on to the first one that looks our way. We forget to wait on God and see if this is from Him. We try to make this new thing, opportunity, person fit  We slap a praise on it and say it must be God's will for us. We struggle with it, compromise with it, toss away the cornerstones that we are supposed to build on and hope for the best. In the end monster anything you build on a shaky foundation will fall.

A rule of thumb to remember is God will never bless you with something that brings you grief. When God makes a promise He keeps it, He doesn't need your help to make it happen. Remember Abraham. He wanted a son, God promised him one, He got tired of waiting and produced Ishmael. That opened a whole can of worms, read your Bible. If He had waited on God, waited on his Issac blessing he could have saved a lot of people heartache, including himself. So monster the question you want to ask yourself is, does what you are trying to build fit on your foundation? If it doesn't, if you have to compromise your foundation it is not your blessing, it is a distraction. You can build with the distraction and get an Ishmael or you can wait and put the right blessing on your foundation ( I promise it will fit) and have an Issac. I'm just saying, choose wisely monster, build your foundation on the Rock.

It's Not Above Your Pay Grade.

Hello there monsters. How is the faith walk going?

   Lately I have been hearing a lot of people talk about what they would like to do, what they wish they were able to do, what they would do when God blesses them with a position, status, etc. I don't know about God, but I am sick of hearing about all the good people would do if. If they were a prayer leader, pastor, choir director, if they knew their Bible better, if they were allowed to preach, to teach, to lead, they would do so much good. If they had more money, more time, if someone would just notice all the good that they have to share. If this, if that, if if if if if. I am so sick of If.  They honestly believe that they have to be "in a position" to do something. What position are they waiting for? Exactly what position do you have to have to do good? Is there such a thing as a do gooder position? I think not. People get caught up in status and titles and positions, especially in the church. The truth is that we are so busy striving to be somebody, that we are not helping anybody.
 I believe they are making excuses to not do anything at all. I know that God uses all people, the lowest to the highest to do His will in the earth. In fact the Bible is filled with stories of ordinary folk doing extraordinary things. So what is your excuse?


      You probably are scratching your head now, after all the Bible is full of heroes, Great men and women of God. Look a little closer. These patriarchs and matriarchs of the Bible were just regular folk, regular folk that did extraordinary things. Abraham was a gentile, called out from his people to become the father of the Jewish nation. Moses was a child of slaves, adopted and then exiled by the Egyptians. He was a sheep herder and a self proclaimed poor speaker who led the Israelites out of slavery. Rahab was a prostitute, a foreign woman, an enemy of Israel who would be the mother of Boaz and in turn an ancestor of Jesus.   Ruth, her future daughter in law was also a foreigner, a widow, and poor. David was the youngest and the least of Jesse's sons. He was deeply flawed but his heart and his faith delighted the Lord and he was one of the greatest kings and writer of the Psalms. Samson was an ordinary man with a drinking problem, a terrible anger management issue and a predilection for picking the wrong women.  Joseph was the youngest son and sold into slavery by his own brothers, God used him to not only save the Israelites from famine but the Egyptians as well. Esther was just a simple Jewish girl placed in a beauty pageant when the king tired of his wife. She was able to save her people from laws that would destroy them. The disciples were a rag tag bunch of fishermen, peasants, and a tax collector. This list could go on for days but we will stop here. The point, monster, is that God does not need you to be in a "position" in order to use you. He can use you just as you are right where you are.

We put so much emphasis on what we do, what position we hold in our jobs, our society, our churches and our organizations. We look for people to validate us, to show us that we are important and have influence. 1 Corinthians 1: 27-29 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.  He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things--and the things that are not--to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. The truth is God uses you, He does not care about your position, what others think of you, how important you are or how many people read your blog.  All God needs is a willing heart, a faithful spirit, and hands that are willing to work. So monster, you can stop waiting for your if moment and do it now. Volunteer now, feed the hungry now, donate now, start up a prayer group now, begin a bible study, whatever it is that God has put on your heart to do He has already given you the means to do it. Don't sit there a moment longer holding on  to your if, do good now.

Go forth monster and do good.

Hold on, Prepare for the Harvest

  Fall is here monsters, and it is time to bring in the harvest. Even if you have never planted a thing in your life you know that fall is the time of bringing in the crops. It is the season of preparing for winter, putting away our summer fashion and pulling on knits, jackets and drop dead gorgeous boots. Harvest season is an annual event, without fail we know fall is coming, we know that we have to prepare for winter, we know holidays are coming, we know that summer is officially over. 

  Seasons in nature are easy to tell, even in warm climates you experience the change in the air, the shortening of days, and the heaviness of the annual fall fashion issue of Vogue. The changing of the seasons are so universally known that it is no surprise that the Bible constantly refers to them. It likens our struggles, our hopes, our good times and bad to seasons. Periods of time that are passing, that may feel like forever but are in truth are fleeting. In the Between you may feel like you are in a season full of lack, of doubt, of waiting, of struggle, but just like the natural seasons, your spiritual season will not last long.  As you come to understand that God has a plan for you, that it was established before you were ever born you can learn to weather your season. 

  Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 tell us that there is a time for everything under the sun. everything has its time and place and therefore though it may feel like forever it too will pass, to make way for something else. 
"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; "

    In our lives we will have both good times and bad, times of movement and change and times when we feel like nothing is happening at all. When you find yourself in the stagnant  season it is easy to give up, to feel bad about yourself and your life. It is easy to look at others and covet what they have or what they are doing. Don't give into this monster, it is just a season and it will pass. The season you are in is a growing opportunity, it is a time to prune away what no longer serves you, feed your spirit, water your faith and praise the Lord. Yup in the midst of what you may feel is a bad season, a season of drought, famine, hopelessness, don't forget to praise God. Psalms 1:3 "He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers." reminds us that we are to stand, that our season of yielding fruit is coming. That no matter how harsh the weather may be, no matter what comes against us if we stand and praise him through it, when it passes we will be stronger for it. 

     God has planted a seed in you, you are a seed, you have planted your seeds of faith, you have only to outlast the current season to reap your harvest. A farmer knows that he has to wait for his seeds to sprout, to ripen, before he can harvest, he doesnt plant corn on Monday and reap it on Tuesday. He knows that it may be a dry season, that insects may attack his crop, that bad weather, floods, tornadoes, hail and a host of other things may happen. But a good farmer sows the seed anyway, in earth that he has prepared. He waits and he watches, he irrigates, he weeds, he safegaurds against pests, but mostly he waits, he has patience and faith that his crop will come in. He prepares himself for a harvest. 

     Monster, you are a farmer. You have sown with  faith, you have prayed for what you need/want, you have prepared the ground of your heart, you have watered it with the Word you have safeguarded it from the enemy you are weathering your season. You are preparing yourself for the harvest. So when harvesting season comes be prepared, in the meantime praise him for the season your in. 

Happy harvesting monster. 

Too Good to be True? No It's Better!

How is your life going monster? Is it good, is it better then you expected, Is it all you asked for? Is it phenomenally awesome and blessed?  Take a look. Remember that before you answer the question, you will have what you say you have. Take your time.

In our journey together we have discussed lots of things, your thought life, your prayer life, your social life, etc. I know you have been praying for some things and my prayers have gone up with yours. What have you been believing God for?  Are you waiting on the Lord, expecting Him to do what He has promised? Are you doing the work, preparing yourself for your blessings, working on your prayer life, reading the Word, doing the best you can do in your life as it is now? If you have monster I am sure you are starting to see the blessings flow into your life. You are experiencing breakthroughs. Things are moving faster and new life has been breathed into old bones.

In the midst of this movement you may start to have doubts, after all you have spent so much time praying for something, a job, a promotion, a change,  a child, a house, a relationship,  whatever. If you have been praying for it, expecting it, praising God for it, then monster, when it arrives don't let doubt creep in with it. God is a God of suddenly. Read your Bible. Whenever he moves it is Suddenly. In life when good things happen to us, when they are blessings from God they seem to good to be true. We are taught to be suspicious of things that come into our lives suddenly, of people who enter our lives with no drama, of jobs that open up with no warning, of opportunities that didn't exist yesterday. Suddenly they are there, they are for you, and they bring such joy and happiness. They are more than what you asked for, it might not be what you wanted, but it is everything you need, it is above and beyond anything you could have imagined for yourself. This is the nature of Blessings. Ephesians 3:20 tells us that God is able to do exceedingly abundantly  above all that we ask or think, Jeremiah 29:11 lets us know that God has a plan for us, to prosper us and not to harm us, to give us a hope and a future.

Knowing this how can you listen to the nay sayers who look at your blessings and tell you it is too good to be true. That there must be a catch, that you are fooling yourself. Don't listen to them monster. How big is your God? Is there any limit to what He can do in your life? He knew you before the foundations of the world were made, throughout His Word are constant reminders that if we keep His commandments He will bless you, Numbers 23:19 remind us that God is not a man that he should lie, or that He should change His mind. Take a look at the blessings flowing into your life, all good things come from God. Look at the people/person that God may have sent into your life, look at what they do, listen to how they speak. We know men by their fruit, anyone sent from God will have Godly fruit. They will add to your life, not detract. Same thing with material blessings, they will not bring you pain, grief, stress, etc.

Relax, monster, you have asked, you have believed, you have expected. Enjoy the blessings in your life, share your blessings and testimony with others and for all those that believe that it is too good to be true, pray for them so that one day they will know that if it is that good then it is from God.

What about your friends?

     Hey Monster, how has the fight against hate been going. I have been doing my part, and I will admit that is an uphill battle! It is so much easier to see and comment on the negative then it is to see and appreciate the positive.  We are going to switch it up a bit and talk about the people you have been keeping company with. The people that speak into your life, whether for your good or your ill. Take a good look at the people in your life, are they celebrating your life or are they some of your biggest haters?

    You may have noticed that along your journey you may have lost a few traveling companions. People you used to hear from on a regular basis drop out of sight. You find that the people that were drawn to you when you were at your lowest, or worst begin to disappear. You may even encounter that people you have know nearly your whole life, or at least for a large chunk of it, start to look at you strange. They are noticing the changes you are making in your life, they are seeing what God is doing and they really could care less. They look at your past, and want to keep you there. They laugh at the "new" you and try to discourage any positive growth. They want you to stay the way you were, you know the way they remember you. Here is what it looks like monster.

    You were always the girl with tons of drama, you partied, you drank, you were up for last minute trips anywhere. You had lots of guys, lots of heartbreak, lots of bad breaks. You could sit for hours talking about all your drama, and they could shake their heads and commiserate with you, while secretly enjoying your pain. Why? Because they could tell themselves, "at least I am not her".  The thing about getting over your past and moving forward is that sometimes people need to be left in the past as well. They will never see you as anything other then what you used to be. No matter how much you have changed, what you have learned or how far you have traveled you will always be the "old you" to them. 

Be careful of this monster. You will be tempted to live up to their low expectations. They will encourage you to revel in the bad behaviors of the Before, and they will rejoice in your backsliding. Or maybe you have made some new friends, maybe they remind you of the way you used to be. You think that you could be a good influence on them, after all you have come so far, you know so much. The danger of this is that you are new at this new life thing. They are more likely to draw you into their mess then you are to draw them out. 1 Corinthians 15:33 Be not deceived: evil companions corrupt good morals. 
Proverbs 24 is full of warnings about becoming friends with people who are evil, who speak deceitfully, who plot against others, who lie in wait for trouble, who are foolish. In other words it is like my grandma used to say birds of a feather flock together. Take a good hard look at the people in your life, is it time to let some of them go? You never stop loving them, praying for them , treating them with respect, but you should be careful about the time you spend with them, what secrets of the heart you entrust to them, and what influence you allow them to have in your life. 

Words are powerful and you have been working hard at controlling the words you use, the thoughts you harbor in your heart and what you speak into your life. Doesn't it make sense to limit the words and thoughts that others speak into your life, especially when they are not for your highest good? 
You have been doing such a good job cleaning out your life, getting rid of the junk, and filling your heart with the gifts of the spirit, now it is time to clean up your friendship roster. I wish you well in this monster and I pray that once they are gone God will send you the right people to share your life with.  In fact I know he will. He has already started filling my life with people who genuinely care for me, who celebrate with me, who speak truth and love into my life.  God is a God of relationship. He wants to have a relationship with you, and He wants you to have great relationships with others. 
Today, monster, I pray that for you. 

Keep It Moving....

Happy Monday Monsters!!! Wow it is already the end of July. Time is flying by even though at times it feels like nothing is moving forward. I can totally feel the earth spinning under my feet sometimes when my day feels like it is in fast forward. At other times I feel like snails are zooming past me. It gets very frustrating when you have you so much you want to get done and nothing seems to be progressing. In the between, you feel like everyone and everything is moving forward, and you are at a standstill or worse in reverse. You are watching your friends zoom ahead in their careers, families, relationships, whatever and you have yet to pick out what shoe your going to wear today. It is like your coming in dead last in the race. You saw yourself so much further ahead in life then where you are now. losing

This is just an illusion monster. There is no race. You may be in a different place then where you thought. You might not be working fast enough to "keep up" with where you think you should be, but you are not losing. You, monster, are in the perfect place, at the perfect time, for you. In the Between you will learn about Divine timing. God's time is totally different from ours. He thinks in Eternity while we struggle with the Now. I want a career Now, I want a boyfriend Now, I want a baby Now, I want that promotion Now, I want the new house, car, life, money, etc. Now. You are looking around at everything and everybody else and saying why them and not me. They are getting theirs Now. Well monster you are not them and you don't know what they did, went through or experienced to get their Now. Your Now is coming, just not right now.

Sucks huh? I have always had a problem with patience. I am a go-getter. I like to keep it moving. If something is not working i fix it, discard it, or trade it in and I keep it moving. I was taught to go and get what I wanted. I was a Wonder Woman. I kicked butt and took names, and did not have to practice patience.

 Well in the Between you will find that your old way of doing things does not work. Hustle as hard as you want, you still will not get to the Next. I told you the Between is a character building workout. In life you can't do 10 sit-ups and get an instant six pack. You have to eat right, exercise daily, work out those muscles, throw in some cardio and earn your six pack. Same thing applies to building your Character. You have to get rid of bad habits, bad thinking, bad living and start building good habits, good thinking and Godly living. It is going to take time, and effort.

There is good news!!! You seriously didn't think I would leave you without any did you? No matter how long you may spend in the between, wandering in the wilderness, dealing with your mess God has a plan and a promise for you. You are not losing anything. You are gaining. And God has promised to Restore all that you have lost, better yet He will give you more than you lost, more than you dreamed or hoped. Joel 2:25
 ^"And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm," I know, it sounds crazy who was talking about worms anyway. Dig deeper, God will restore to you anything and everything that has been taken. Your job, your home, your relationship, your friendship, your children, your strength, your health, your joy, the list is endless. It does not matter how old you are, how young you are, where you are, God has promised restoration and not just replacement but more and better then what you lost. Joshua 24:13 "So I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant."


This means monster, that your life is not at a standstill. You are not losing, it is never too late and  you have no expiration date. He will open doors for you and you will be able to walk through them, He will bless you beyond measure. This is not to say that you can just sit back and wait for it, it is to give you hope, to know that all you are working towards is waiting for you and you will have it. Not Now but Soon. So quit looking at what others are doing, having, etc. and get about your business. Don't you have some work to do? Keep it Moving 

Hungry for something? Feed your Spirit!!

    Hey Monsters, miss me? I missed you. Just wanted to give you some time to work on your truth. It is hard work dealing with yourself. A lot of heavy lifting, examining, and cleaning. Enough to make you want to sleep  just thinking about it. I don't know about you but when I have a large project to do I throw on some music and attack that project head on. I tear apart the entire space and put it back together again. A few hours and your done.  It is not that way when your working on yourself. You need to stop and take breaks. Emotional baggage is difficult to clean up, sort through, and deal with. Some people take to keeping a journal, or spend hours meditating and doing yoga, others sift through their physical past and relive each moment. Whatever you choose to do it is not easy. It is draining. If it was easy most of the people walking around today would not have so many issues and thousands of therapists, counselors, and life coaches would be out of work. Come to think of it, I would have nothing to write about. Good thing for me, you, monster have issues. Even better news is your willing and able to work them out.

 So what do you need to refuel with when your working on your mind and spirit? I am glad you asked. You need to feed your spirit with spirit! Yup, just like with exercise you need to fuel your physical body to get optimum results, the same goes for your spirit. No cheating, no filling up on junk food. You got to get the good stuff. You, monster are going to have to tap into the wisdom of the ages, starting with your Bible! Yup I said it, The Bible. If you are even the least bit intimidated by it start in Psalms, nothing but praise to the Almighty in every one! ( It is a good place to start if you want to learn how to pray too. There has been many a day when I just read one Psalm and meditate on it for the rest of the day. It's good stuff. Some more food for your spirit, read inspirational stories of women you admire, go to the library and check out books from Iyanla Vanzant, Joyce Meyer, T.D. Jakes, Creflo Dollar, Paula White, Joel Olsteen, the list is endless, just hang out in the Christian section and I guarantee you will find something that will call to you. It is calling to your spirit! Feed your spirit.

Daily life is constantly draining from you, people, work, children, life. They all take from you. It is important to set aside some time each day to refill. You are no fun when your drained, you lack vitality, energy, love, and patience. Life becomes a trial instead of a joy. When your spirit is on E, you are not good for anyone let alone yourself. So next time you have that empty feeling inside, that gnawing ache that is not filled with food or water, listen to it. It is your spirit asking for a snack. Well don't just sit there fill it up .

Just because it's a fact...doesn't mean it's true

     Happy Monday monsters. Did you know that the more blogs you read the smarter you get?  Also, if you are a single woman in her mid to late 30's you are more likely to never have a child. Did you know that there is a shortage of men, and that 60% of women will never get married? Hey, did you hear that 59% of children that grow up in single family homes will be more likely to raise their own children in a single parent home? Did you know that 57% of African American men admitted to actively seeking a woman of another culture/ethnicity to marry?  Shockingly 67% of black women will not ever marry regardless of age or economic status, and that these same women are more likely to have children out of wedlock?
     67% of men say that they have cheated on their partner. In a recent survey white women were considered the most desirable in a marriage partner, with Asian making a close second, followed by Hispanic, Other, Mixed race and Black coming in last. A recent "study" found that overweight women are more likely to be single, short men prefer taller women, and a man regardless of his looks, weight or height will have a better chance of marrying if he makes six figures or more. On the contrary a woman making six figures or more, no matter how beautiful she may be, will either have to settle or be single.  Or how about this one, 48% of all the people reading this blog believe at least one of the above stated "facts" is true.

       Sorry to disappoint you but most of what is stated above I just made up. Not off the top of my head or anything just purely based on the random opinions and unscientific polls that are conducted in women's magazines, online surveys, and random overheard conversations that women have on a regular basis. You can come up with a statistic on just about anything, and most people will believe it. Hey who can argue with math? I barely passed my statistics class but I know that you can slant your results by polling a targeted group versus a totally random one. I am just saying, you can make a fact about pretty much anything, it just doesn't make it the truth.

    While you have been busy cleaning out your life and your mind you have found that you have more room, some empty space waiting to be filled. Be careful monster an empty space is still a place. A place where you begin storing stuff. Thoughts, ideas, facts, experiences. In the Between you need to be vigilant about guarding these now clean and empty spaces. You need to be careful about what you allow to take up this space. We all plan to only fill our lives with things that edify us. That teach us a better way to live, to think, to act etc. Your main source should be your Bible, but realistically we fill those spaces with things that look good, like self help books, random advice, talk shows and magazine articles. Hey we are working on ourselves after all I told you to read, to learn and to grow. Yes I did. I neglected to tell you to edit and filter what you  are putting in yourself. I am sorry. It was only Revealed to me on my daily torture session, oops I mean exercise session.

   Just because something may be a "fact" does not make it true. Our media is meant to inform us, but mostly it circulates fears and insecurities. It sells millions of copies  each month selling fear. Are you eating the right things, wearing the right things, do you measure up to the beautiful images of women between its covers, do you know how to keep your man satisfied, Do you know how to get the right job, apartment, man?
 The list goes on and on. Worse they put out polls on nearly everything. My question is who are they asking? Where are they getting their facts, and what does it have to do with the truth?

Don't throw them out, you do not have to quit reading them, you don't have to turn off your talk shows, but you do need to quit having a steady diet of them. Most importantly you need to filter any and all information you may get from them. This is what it looks like.

     On one of my jogs I saw an attractive man walking by. He smiled and kept going and out of nowhere all these thoughts bombarded me. Thoughts that went a lot like this. "Hmmm, I am over 30, everybody knows that as you get older it is harder to date. Maybe  I was too fat, guys don't like women with too many curves. Yeah I am a single mom guys don't want to have to raise a kid that is not his. (how he could possibly know that I was a mom did not even enter into my thoughts.), I am not even on his radar, He probably doesn't like black women. And a whole lot of other mess that I will not share with you. In reality the guy probably never gave me another thought as he went past, while I was beating my self up with all the facts I had gleaned from media and other misinformed women. Lucky for me I tripped. While I was physically tripping, the Holy Spirit informed me that I was mentally tripping and to cut it out immediately.

So I cut it out. I told myself out loud the truth. The Truth is I am a Child of the Most High God. That I am fine just the way I am. That it does not matter what man says about me. That I am fearfully and wondrously made, that God has a plan for me, that He knows the desires of my heart.  That all these "facts" were not the Truth. That I needed to have a better filter on the things I allowed into my mind. I also knew that I had to examine each of these "facts" find their source and eliminate them. So I rarely watch talk shows, I turn off all those reality shows that show women as mistreated, spoiled, chronically single, over dramatic, unloved and unlovable. Yup I had to clean out my Tivo. More importantly I had to discard these "facts" and find the Truth about me.

   As long as you hold on to the "facts" you cannot know the truth. So monster today, examine all the "facts" about yourself and your situation and figure out if they are the Truth. I can guarantee that most of the '"facts" you believe about yourself are not true at all. Throw them out. After all everybody knows the Truth will set you free.

Be free monster, be free.

Fuggedaboudit....Forgive them, all of them

       Hope your loving your Wednesday monsters. I am about to go dance in the rain. Yup that is how I get my joy on. Don't forget that today is the day to get your joy on too. So Dance, but not yet, read this first, then dance. So please excuse the liberty that I have taken with my spelling. In other words I am asking for your forgiveness. That was easy. Most of the time it is not. It is hard to admit when you were wrong, doubly  so when you feel that you are not wrong.
        Forgiveness is a funny creature. There are some situations where it readily appears, like forgiving me my spelling mistakes. There are other situations where finding it is near impossible, like in the case of a broken heart, or a betrayal of trust. It is even harder to forgive when it is not really an action but perhaps a conduct or behavior or word that has given you offense. While you are in your Between time you have been cleaning out your stuff. Looking at the past and the people in it. You have probably found some situations and some people that you have been offended by. I know I have. I have probably even held a grudge. Or two. O.k. maybe a dozen or so. Well what do you do? Some of these things happened long ago, maybe you don't even know where the offender is, or perhaps you told them you forgave them already, even though a small kernel of unforgiveness lives in your heart. What then? Is it really a big deal, after all its the past and the past cannot hurt you, right?

The past may not be able to reach out and slap you, but it will hinder you from moving into the Next. That little piece of unresolved issue can grow into a huge pile of unresolved issues. It will affect how you deal with future similar situations, it will affect how you treat people, it will poison your relationships and it will open up the floodgates that will water the bitterness you have been so successful in rooting out. So, yeah it is a big deal.

Forgiveness is not about the other person. It is about you. Chances are they don't even know or care that they have hurt or offended you. They are not losing any sleep and skipping happily along with their life. Unaware and most likely totally oblivious to your pain. Nope, monster it is not for them it is for you. You are going to have to dig deep for this one. It is going to take some work and it may not happen over night, but if you are active, willing, and loving enough it will happen . You must forgive everyone and everything that has caused you to be in the Between, this includes yourself. You are going to have reach in deep and be truly honest. Your decisions, choices, and actions are what got you here. Forgive yourself. Embrace yourself, love yourself , take the lesson the universe is showing you and then forgive yourself. This part is easy. Well kind of easy, on to the heavy lifting.

Take a breath and go back to each situation where you have been hurt or offended by someone else. It doesn't matter if you were close to them or if it was the guy who took your parking spot, or the last seat on the bus. Picture them in your head, smile and forgive them. Then let it go. For people who you love/loved this may take several tries. You will have to check in every once in awhile with your feelings to make sure that you have truly forgiven them. Why is this important? Because sweet one, you will continue to draw the same type of situations and people into your life that will mirror the hurt and pain until you deal with it. Talk about Deja Vu.

What does this look like. We will use an easy example. Men. You are looking back on all your past relationships and you start to see a pattern, All the men you date have the same physical attributes, same type of personality, same type of vibe about them. That could just be chalked up to what you like, so let's dig deeper. As you look at all your relationships they all seem to have been emotionally or physically unavailable. Maybe it was physical distance, maybe they worked or traveled, perhaps they were still involved with someone else. Doesn't matter. Now you have located the problem, you have seen how with hindsight all of them were doomed to fail. Well here is where forgiveness comes in. Forgive them for being who they were and forgive yourself for picking them. Let it go. Now you can see that type coming and avoid them, lesson learned. Or, you can claim to be over it, and keep repeating the cycle over and over again. God will allow you to repeat this lesson as many times as it takes. Let it go. Forgive all of them. Write their names on a piece of paper and throw it in a lake, rip it up and scatter it. Let them go, thank them for the lesson and move on.

Be aware that once you have done this the Universe will test you. I will put you in situations that are similar it will send you people who remind you of. _____________, it will try to trick you and test you. You might fail. No, you will fail, first time out, after that it is cake, you will be able to laugh about it and recognize the next one instantly! lesson learned. You must practice this daily. Forgive them.

The most important reason to forgive is that in the Bible it clearly states they we are forgiven. As undeserving as we may be God is able and willing to forgive us. It also says that if we harbor any unforgiveness in our hearts that God will not forgive us. (Matt.6:14-15) You got to give, to get monster. Do not block your blessings and your prayers over petty man-made mess. Forgive and let go.  Now you get to work on that, I have to go out and sing in the rain. Save some time for your joy!

Be the Blessing

Happy Monday Monsters, I hope you enjoyed your weekend and took a day to play, to breathe and to laugh. The first lesson you will learn in the Between is patience. Your looking toward the Next, cleaning out your Past, working out your Between and hopefully you are not waiting around for a Blessing. You, monster, are already experiencing blessings. Your learning, your growing and when you stop and breathe you see all the blessings around you. You are covered in blessings, and in the Next you will be over run with them. In the Between you learn to see the simple blessings God provides daily. You might not have what you want, but God will always provide what you need. I have learned that the quickest way to experience the Blessing you have been praying for is to be the Blessing: in someone else's life. 


That's right. I am dragging you out of your closet, your hidden space where you are working on you to encourage you to be a Blessing. In the Between you will be tempted to hold on to what you have. To keep your things close, after all you have control over your material things. Your time is precious, you have things to do, jobs to apply to, a child to raise, a job to get to, a relationship to develop, this could be an endless list of things you need for you. Well as long as you focus on you, the Blessing your waiting for will continue to wait on you. Its not a typo it is the truth. God has already answered your prayer. Everything you have asked for is waiting for you, you have to get past you to get it. How do you do that? Be a Blessing.


This is what it looks like. You have been praying for a breakthrough, for a man, a house, clothes, food. I don't know what your praying for but it is time to get off your knees and get to work. The Word says that God will bless the works of your hands, well if your hands are not doing anything what is there to bless? All your prayers have been about what you need, what you want, what you can't do without, etc. Once again you have entered Self-ishness. Move away from Self and focus on Others. 

I am not bragging, I am sharing hopefully something in this will inspire you to be a Blessing. I do not have a job, instead of sitting around waiting for the phone to ring I volunteer. I counsel teen moms. I put all the focus into it that I would my career. As a result I am able to bring joy and love into other peoples lives. Since I am not working I cannot fill my desire to shop. I know sad right. I clean out my closet and my daughters closet and clothes every few months and donate them to Goodwill. Our closets are overflowing with clothes, and I have not shopped in years. Each month I take bags of food to the food pantry and our kitchen is overflowing with food. We can't eat it fast enough. My mom loves to garden but does not have the time. I get down and dirty in her garden and it is overflowing with flowers, fruit, we had so many tomatoes we were giving bags of them away! I live in my mother's home, like a visitor for months until God revealed to me that I was praying for a home and I had one. I got up and now I clean my mother's home, take care of her animals, fix her meals all the things I would do for a husband and I realized I was in training for the life I said I wanted, but for her I was the Blessing she was praying for. For the women I counsel, I am the help they have been praying for. For the ones who benefit from my clothing and food I am the Blessing they have been praying for. In Blessing others with the little I had, with the works of my hands God has blessed me in abundance.

I am not telling you to give something to get something, but I am sharing with you that if you will bless others God will bless you. So to steal from Barack's last campaign. Change. Be the change you want to see in your life.  So today monster go be a blessing, you can start by smiling at every one you meet. That smile you give may be the one thing that changes their day for the better. Be the Blessing.

Resurrection: Its Not Just For Easter

Good Morning, monsters. Hope you enjoyed your holiday. How did the soul searching go? Did you get that bitter taste out of your mouth, more importantly did you begin to root it out of your soul. I know its difficult, I warned you that it was a tricky, sneaky thing. It may take awhile to get its tendrils out of the nooks and crannies of your soul, but keep at it. I am constantly walking around with a bottle of Round-Up, squirting every nasty tendril that pops its head up. Every day I am hacking away at that root. Writing this is killing the bitterness, every key stroke is making it weaker and soon, it will be all gone.

On to today's topic. Congratulations graduate you have left the Before. You've put away all your exes, you have stopped the back in the day episodes, and you have retired from your party planning career. Now what? If your anything like me, your shocked. For the first time you are awake, and the light is blinding. You look around and realize you have been living in a bubble, life has gone on merrily around you and your having a bad hair day, your wearing ugly sweats, and you can give a detailed recap of every bad reality show on television. Don't go back into hiding! Shake it off. Get up get out of those nasty sweats, do a mini makeover, and face the day. Really face it.

When I finally came to myself I was shocked. I was chilling on the couch eating chips, watching some inane woman making a fool of herself on national T.V.  and I caught my reflection. I had become a couch potato. Me! I hadn't rocked heels in a year, my poor babies were locked away in boxes, and what was I wearing, pajamas at 3 in the afternoon? My nails were not done, my legs not shaved, and I was rocking my natural hair color. This had gone too far. Your wake up may not look like this but its still a wake up you begin to take notice of what your doing, eating wearing, you notice your surroundings, congratulations baby you are awake. Today is your Resurrection Day.

So what does this mean? It means you are no longer distracted by what you lost, you've stopped all the distractions, you have begun working on your bitterness and suddenly you have become aware of yourself. This is a strange moment. Now that your not looking back, you can look forward and all you see are possibilities. The whole world has opened up to you, its like you have not been breathing and you can finally fill your lungs. You get off that couch, march into the bathroom and reclaim you.  This post is going to be short. Today you are going to be so excited about you that this blog is just blocking you from saying hello to you. So monster go do it. Change your hair, put on some make up, go sit in the sun. Today is the first day of your new life. Get to It. Because after today we step into the In Between. Enjoy your day